Listen before fixing
Give the worry a little space. “Tell me which bit feels scary” can be easier to answer than “Why are you worried?”
For parents and caregivers
First day at school anxiety: helping your child feel ready
A first day can feel exciting, enormous and a little wobbly. Here are some gentle, practical ways to help a young child prepare without pretending the worry is not there.
When the first day feels very big
Starting school can bring excitement and worry at the same time. Health professionals note that many children feel anxious when going to a new school, and younger children may not always be able to explain clearly what they are feeling.
A child may talk about a tummy ache, become clingier, have trouble sleeping or simply say they do not want to go. Rather than dismissing the worry, try to listen and work out which part of the day feels hardest.
Make the unknown smaller
Talk through simple details: getting dressed, the journey, where you will say goodbye, who will meet them and when you will return.
Practice tiny pieces
Try the school journey, practice putting on uniform or opening a lunch box. Familiarity can make the first morning feel less mysterious.
Talk with school
If a particular part of school is worrying your child, share that with their teacher. Pediatric and mental health organizations both recommend working with school to identify what is difficult and what support may help.
A story to open the conversation
Ollie has a tummy wobble too
In Ollie’s first Collyvale story, he is six and determined to wear his Brave Face. But the school is enormous, everything sounds loud and his tummy keeps wobbling. Reading together can give a child another character to talk about before they have to talk about themselves.
Read the free 8-page preview → Buy the paperback on Amazon ↗
When to ask for more help
Occasional worry around a new experience can be part of childhood. If anxiety is strong, persists, gets worse or starts interfering with everyday life, health professionals recommend seeking help. A doctor, school nurse and your child’s school are useful places to start.
Trusted information: HealthyChildren.org (American Academy of Pediatrics) · NAMI.org (National Alliance on Mental Illness)
A free help pack for starting school
For grown-ups: a free printable pack to try together at home.
Collyvale offers general information and gentle activities for families. It is not a medical or mental-health service. If worry is persistent, severe or getting in the way of everyday life, speak to your child’s school, school nurse or doctor.
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